Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
4 words: hood of his car
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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