Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
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