ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
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