you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize