hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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