i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
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