Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just pee around me
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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