I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
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