I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
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