You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
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