I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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