So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize