Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Randomize