She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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