it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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