And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at about main and main street
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize