Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize