Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Terrible idea I love it
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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