if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Drunk is not a location!
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize