you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize