I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
i need to put some appletini on your dick
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
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