that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
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I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
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So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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