mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize