people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Drake has all the answers
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize