I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Why are your pants in the freezer?
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
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