I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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