Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize