O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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