There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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