Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize