so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
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I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
this is an emotional support booty call
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I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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