im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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