17 year olds will be the death of me.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize