Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
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i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
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There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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