At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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