You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
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I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
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And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
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