Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
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