Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
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I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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