omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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