just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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