If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
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I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
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