a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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