You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
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