I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
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