dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
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