it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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