The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
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