this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
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He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
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How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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