question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
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I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
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I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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