You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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